But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
