Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone

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(732): View more from New Jersey

It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.

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(970): View more from Colorado

The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night

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(815): View more from Illinois

I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.

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(513): View more from Ohio

Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire

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(404): View more from Georgia

I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.

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(519): View more from Ontario

You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.

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(941): View more from Florida

i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.

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