Texts From Last Night

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  (586): View more from Michigan

  I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now

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  (586): I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now http://tfl.nu/yx20
  Replies (1) Good night (1508) Bad night (587)
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  (518): View more from New York

  Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.

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  (518): Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird. http://tfl.nu/mxsq
  Replies (8) Good night (596) Bad night (2052)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.

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  (240): Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names. http://tfl.nu/nfcq
  Replies (26) Good night (979) Bad night (5138)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do

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  (203): But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do http://tfl.nu/ke2v
  Replies (19) Good night (4953) Bad night (1321)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.

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  (206): He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears. http://tfl.nu/u9sm
  Replies (20) Good night (2008) Bad night (3456)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.

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  (413): you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006. http://tfl.nu/ojn9
  Replies (8) Good night (1535) Bad night (4778)
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  (571): View more from Virginia

  I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.

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  (571): I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet. http://tfl.nu/230n
  Replies (5) Good night (2894) Bad night (1054)
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  (315): View more from New York

  I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?

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  (315): I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here? http://tfl.nu/pgo7
  Replies (8) Good night (1022) Bad night (2987)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours

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  (419): You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours http://tfl.nu/i7uw
  Replies (2) Good night (2043) Bad night (647)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.

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  (850) Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen. http://tfl.nu/kqm3
  Replies (2) Good night (954) Bad night (410)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5

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  (413): Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5 http://tfl.nu/y1kc
  Replies (9) Good night (1014) Bad night (451)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.

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  (919): It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake. http://tfl.nu/4cm4
  Replies (9) Good night (388) Bad night (1058)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.

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  (860): 6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever. http://tfl.nu/56gz
  Replies (1) Good night (441) Bad night (246)
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  (805): View more from California

  getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine

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  (805): getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine http://tfl.nu/rtlz
  Replies (3) Good night (264) Bad night (170)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy

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  (503): i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy http://tfl.nu/z4np
  Replies (4) Good night (526) Bad night (216)

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