Texts From Last Night

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  (586): View more from Michigan

  A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women

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  (586): A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women http://tfl.nu/ivdc
  Replies (3) Good night (1711) Bad night (613)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!

  (1-313): View more from Michigan

  "omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"

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  (313): Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!! (1-313): "omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore" http://tfl.nu/6kn3
  Replies (20) Good night (815) Bad night (1552)
• Favorite

  (949): View more from California

  i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit

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  (949): i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit http://tfl.nu/gr8g
  Replies (13) Good night (3323) Bad night (1110)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.

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  (818): She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on. http://tfl.nu/3dyc
  Replies (31) Good night (984) Bad night (9801)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.

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  (602): You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary. http://tfl.nu/hnqx
  Replies (24) Good night (5544) Bad night (1189)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.

  (614): View more from Ohio

  Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money

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  (317): Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina. (614): Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money http://tfl.nu/rx4e
  Replies (27) Good night (6964) Bad night (1602)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up

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  (440): maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up http://tfl.nu/j6pu
  Replies (6) Good night (3125) Bad night (1692)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.

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  (512): Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough. http://tfl.nu/vxm3
  Replies (10) Good night (1685) Bad night (732)
• Favorite

  (905): View more from Ontario

  I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.

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  (905): I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio. http://tfl.nu/hxom
  Replies (3) Good night (1450) Bad night (569)
• Favorite

  (864): View more from South Carolina

  I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"

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  (864): I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY" http://tfl.nu/isd1
  Replies (7) Good night (1952) Bad night (574)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life

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  (412): And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life http://tfl.nu/4nsr
  Replies (6) Good night (972) Bad night (540)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee

  (1-616): View more from Michigan

  i will live by this rule

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  (616): life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee (1-616): i will live by this rule http://tfl.nu/j6ih
  Replies (6) Good night (880) Bad night (430)
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat

  (818): View more from California

  You had me at first table

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  (210): First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat (818): You had me at first table http://tfl.nu/zwwm
  Replies (0) Good night (974) Bad night (389)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?

  (1-516): View more from New York

  all of them.

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  (516): mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs? (1-516): all of them. http://tfl.nu/l17j
  Replies (5) Good night (1204) Bad night (244)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  My dick has a subreddit

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  (630): My dick has a subreddit http://tfl.nu/u9zr
  Replies (1) Good night (433) Bad night (199)

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