Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(478): View more from Georgia

So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis

(410): View more from Maryland

Sounds like a really classy character....

(478): View more from Georgia

He is classy. It was argyle.

Fav 18 6961 1027
share tweet
(864): View more from South Carolina

we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me

Fav 27 4225 1098
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(617): View more from Massachusetts

Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'

(617): View more from Massachusetts

we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom

Fav 24 1133 2835
share tweet
(617): View more from Massachusetts

So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"

Fav 17 5554 1073
share tweet
27 Unforgettable Hookup Texts
Read it at the TFLN blog
(253): View more from Washington

When are you comin back?

(1-253): View more from Washington

probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons

Fav 3 2159 910
share tweet
(214): View more from Texas

um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.

Fav 17 3178 1695
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(215): View more from Pennsylvania

OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND

Fav 23 2087 915
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(919): View more from North Carolina

He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?

Fav 0 320 537
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(607): View more from New York

He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.

(740): View more from Ohio

Keep him.

Fav 2 115 14
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT