Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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