I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Randomize
