I showed him my bush... on skype.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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