Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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