would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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