I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
