is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
Randomize
