I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
