i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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