Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize