I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
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