did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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