Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
