I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I think people are normalizing furries
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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