I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Randomize