try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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