No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
