I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Just pee around me
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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