If that was your dad, he is hot
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
