worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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