she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Randomize