so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Randomize