Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
