$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
There's always time for handjobs
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize