I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
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If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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