No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
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She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
I did not marry a roomba.
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