i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
