So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
