I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
