i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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