hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Randomize
