You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
