we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
