Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Randomize
