You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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