He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
