It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
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