I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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