i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
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