But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
