Define "chronic" masturbator.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
