you mean i was at the winter classic?
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
