yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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