rhymes with "ouble enetration"
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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