Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize
