Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Randomize
